Full Disclosure: His Finances, His Health
Is it necessary or an over-the-top demand?
When you enter into a relationship with a man you want to know every last detail about him. His health: Is everything in check? What's his history? His finances: Is he in the black? What's his savings account look like? Is he signed on to the 401(k)? But is asking for full disclosure okay or might it suggest that you may not fully trust your new partner. We'd say asking questions is always a good idea, within reason. Some bits of information, though, you'd do well to wait to trickle out.
DO: Ask about his health. It's normal to want to know any health concerns your partner may have,, how often he gets checked by his doctor, what his family history is.
DON'T: Nag. If he's not taking care of his health as well as you would like, think of staging a longer-term project rather than imploring him to call the doctor on the phone that moment to request a physical examination and then request to sit in on the visit with the doctor.Dating A Friend's Ex
DO: Ask about finances if you want to know what you are getting yourself into and what your partner's goals are. Be willing to share all of your own personal finance information as well.
DON'T: Judge a partner by the size of his wallet. How much money a partner has is no indication of how he will treat you in a relationship nor what he will spend his bucks on (fancy cars and business trips or the home of your dreams, who knows?) Don't assume either that a salary can tell you anything about the partner has to money. If you ask about salary, be sure to ask about savings, investments and long-term financial goals, too.
Discussion
This is obviously aimed at those who are Not College Sweethearts or Younger.
NEWSFLASH: It is 2010 people... I say it MUST BE 50 / 50 on all fronts. If You want to check out His Finances, Health, etc... You BETTER Expect Him To Check Yours Out as well. This is an Age of Dual Income or Die, Families. Only the Top 5% of Earners can realistically have a "House Wife" or for that matter, "House Husband" Who is a Full Time Homemaker. (I'm available.)
This, I warn You, makes a Marriage No More than a Business Arrangement and Begs the Question... "Why Bother Marrying if all it is about is Business?".
Marry someone You Love or Don't Get Married, just Draw Up a Business Contract. That is what a Pre-Nuptial Agreement is anyway. If there is No Romance, there will Never be a True Marriage.
DO NOT CHOOSE OR MARRY SOMEONE BECAUSE YOU FEEL THAT YOU CAN LIVE WITH THEM... CHOOSE AND MARRY SOMEONE THAT YOU JUST CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT.!!!
Your Heart Will Know... Trust it.
It seems to me the big question is when is it appropriate to ask these questions? They seem fairly nosy to me.
I got involved with my husband when we were fairly young. We never asked each other about health or family health issues, although when we deal with problems we talked about them. Finance were not an issue since neither of us had anything.
