Some folks believe that falling in love is a matter of fate—trusting that if they go about their lives, they'll meet their soul mates. Others approach it with the strategy of a business investment. Ron James, 48, for example, contacted hundreds of women—sometimes going on three dates in one day(!)—until he met the right one.

Playing the Numbers
After his divorce in 2006, Ron went on a find-a-new-partner mission. He signed up for JDate, a dating service for Jewish singles. "I'd work at it two to three hours a night," he says, managing his love life like he was a CEO. Lost Until I Found Jew: Online Dating at JDate

In the first 18 months, he emailed 500 to 600 women. "I thought it was a respect thing, so I tried to respond to everybody," says Mr. James. "Even if it was just to say that it didn't appear that we would be a good fit. It also became clear after emailing or talking to some on the phone, that it was not the right fit, so I definitely didn't meet all of them."

From there he whittled it down to meeting/dating about 40 to 50 women, sometimes booking three coffee dates in a day.

It may sound extreme, but experts say that casting a wide net is a common approach, especially for guys. "I think men believe in the numbers theory—the more women they meet, the more likely they are to find the right one for them," says Cherie Burbach, author of "Internet Dating Is Not Like Ordering Pizza."

Men—who may be more task-oriented than women—tend to treat online dating like fishing: Cast a wide net and see what happens.

Following Her Gut
Sheryl Daija, 44, joined JDate in late 2007. Like Ron, she had recently ended a 13-year marriage. Most of her time immediately post-divorce was devoted to making profound changes in her life—like developing the social activist site The Power of Peace and splitting time between NYC and a country home upstate.

Once she felt settled, JDate was a way for her to dip her toe back in the dating pool. "I took time after I got divorced to rediscover myself, so when I got online I was pretty clear about what I wanted and what I didn't want," she says, adding that she relied on intuition more than strategy when she finally decided to "try again."

"I think it was a combination of luck and fate," says Sheryl. "I was definitely pretty selective in who I responded to." Both she and Ron think that using an ethnic-based dating service helped them narrow down their options from the get-go. (Imagine how many women he'd have had to weed out had he used a mainstream site like match.com!)

Fortunately, Sheryl avoided the common mistake of being too selective. "Women tend to discount men on things they read in their profile," says Burbach. "The problem with this is that not every profile accurately reflects a dater's personality."

Ron was the third person whom Sheryl met (altogether!) through online dating. Top 8 Reasons Online Dating Is Great