We're relieved our own pregnancy desires are dim flickers in the distant future, because we would drive ourselves absolutely nuts keeping up with all these ding-bat how-pregnancy-happens theories. Pregnancy Makes Women Smarter

It's getting to be a bit much.

Today we stumbled upon two studies touting how physical attractiveness plays a role in sperm and their swimming skills. Apparently, an ugly man and beautiful woman have the greatest (theoretical) success rate for making a baby. Sigh. Further proof God is a man.

The Telegraph reported today that sperm are a lot smarter than the species they inhabit. According to scientists, evolution has caused "sperm loads" to thicken or thin depending on how much sex the male gets (there wasn't any mention of masturbation and if that effects anything). If he's a playa-about-town with a new female on his arm every weekend, they theorize his sperm load upon ejaculation is more slight. He has to save up, afterall. So therefore he'll have less of a chance of impregnating his flavors of the week. Smart Men Make Better Sperm

On the flipside, if he's in a dry spell and getting laid, oh, once (maybe) he's more likely to shoot a massive wad that will, in turn, impregnate his lady.

This is evident amongst "many species" in the wild, they say. But, of course, this hasn't been proven amongst humans. But that hasn't stopped scientists from frothing at the mouth.

PhD student Sam Tazzyman at University College London says the sperm load theory is a sophisticated survival technique passed on from generation to generation. The male body naturally adjusts for highest reproductive success.

If a male puts a lot of resources into each mating he will get more offspring per mating, but at the expense of fewer matings. If, on the other hand, a male puts few resources into each mating he will secure less paternity per mating, but will be able to carry out more matings overall. Thus, there is a trade-off between number of matings and success per mating. How a male negotiates this trade-off depends on how easy he finds it to attract females. The more attractive a male is, the more females will be willing to mate with him, reducing the value of each mating to him.

Now onto the hot ladies. This one's a bit dicier. Discovery.com posted an item saying that scientists have found in the red junglefowl (a distant relative of the chicken) pregnancy rates are more steady when the males mate with the attractive junglefowl.