The last time I had sex was with somebody totally unimportant and there was no emotions attached. It was a summer fling that died down as September started. I was not hurt or worried about what had happened. I continued on with life. I went to work, hung out with friends, went to the gym, celebrated the holidays, and minded my own business. Around February I noticed that not only was I going to be single for Valentine's day (once again) but I had not had sex in five months. The longest dry spell I had before was six months so I had not passed it yet but I was coming close. I again continued on minding my own business but I noticed certain things were changing in my character. I started snapping at people for little mistakes, I had very strong opinions over things I never gave much attention to before, and I started being very judgemental over my friend's and especially over THEIR love lives. It also didn't help when we got together and went out, I was completely invisible to the opposite sex! I was getting no play! No man would even speak to me. It seemed like I was oozing frustration and men did not like that at all, which led to even more frustration!!!
My snapiness and bitchy remarks led to an argument with a very close friend in which she responded with "Jeez, somebody needs to get laid". I got so enraged as my sexual activity had nothing to do with the argument, but as I calmed down I realized it totally did. I do not know how or why but I knew that if I was having regular sex I would not be in the situation where I am right now. Pist off at the world.
I started to become more aware of my moods and remarks and as time tracks along I am looking at almost one year this August of NO SEX. I am determined to break the dry spell this summer but should I just jump on the first person thats willing to take me to bed?? Hire a prostitute??? (Just Kidding) Will I even remember how to DO IT?? Will it hurt all over again?? Im sure it wont but its nerve wrecking to think about getting intimate with someone else when you haven't been touched for that long. Should I wait longer until I find someone special?? Is it even that long??? Look at me crying over a year when maybe there's people out there who have gone longer. How do they cope with life??
I have never been in a relationship so I would like to find someone to call my own and find out what sex in LOVE feels like. Im sorry I mean MAKING love feels like. But until then I just need to get laid.
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