An ad wants near-perfect wingwomen and we've got some fictitious picks for the job.
If it wasn't for these sites, we would have missed this oh-so-classy help wanted ad for a "Personal Introduction Assistant" or "Wingwoman."
Now, the employment posting wants applicants to be classy and dress well, and states the following about the ideal applicant:
"Must be able to do 4 things: 1) start conversations with beautiful women; 2) after that, remain totally silent, unless spoken directly to, but smile and look friendly while the man you are "winging" orchestrates the social situation; 3) socialize and block any man or woman attempting to interfere with the man you are winging and any woman he is chatting with; and 4) end any conversation you are having instantly at the direction of the man you are winging. These requirements are essential, not for everyone, and difficult to do well."
Great. And to drive home the point:
"This job is not for you if you are uptight, frumpy, grumpy, shy, a man-hater, a debbie downer, a critic, a control freak, a pouter, a therapist, researching, writing an article, with the press, a prostitute, an escort, a relationship counselor, or a feminist with a bone to pick."
Got that? Maybe then—you too—can be a wingwoman.
Whether or not this ad is real, we couldn't help but think about some of the best fictional characters we think would make great wingwomen. Sure, maybe not all of them would pass the test for this ad, but they'd be great anyhow.
Elle Woods (from Legally Blonde)
If anyone fits this bill better, we'd like to meet to them. Bubbly, classy and intelligent, Elle had it all—and connected with everyone. There was even that time she confessed feelings for the loveable nerd to get other girls interested. Sweet!
Cher Horowitz (from Clueless)
Yes, matchmaking can be hard, but this matchmaking high school student knew how to do it well. Cher's trendy and friendly but knows when to step out of the limelight (hence her unwavering promotion of new girl Ty). Cha-ching! What Guys (Secretly) Think About What You Wear
Robin Scherbatsky (from How I Met Your Mother)
Who better than to be a wingwoman than a former Canadian teen idol turn newscaster. Sure she falls under the "with the press" disqualifier, but if she's good enough for Barney, she's good enough for us.
Andie Anderson (from How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days)
Strong-willed, powerful and knowing what she wants, Andie Anderson played the ideal woman... when she wasn't playing her crazy alter ego. Point is, she knew how to play a part and would be a fantastic wingwoman.
Bridget Jones (from Bridget Jones' Diary)
Probably not your first pick, but hear us out. If you're in need of a conversation starter, Bridget's awful professional and/or love life would be a great starting-off point. Not to mention, as long as she didn't cry while drinking, she'd be a great time.
Gracie Hart (from Miss Congeniality)
Maybe not the ideal wingwoman, the rough and tumble police officer wasn't great at classing it up. However, with enough makeup and training she really made a great beauty pageant contestant. And, if all else fails, she could physically force communication between parties. Seriously, Wear More Eye Makeup
Becky Bloomwood (from Confessions of a Shopaholic)
OK, so perhaps she'd spend a little too much in pursuit of your prey, but what girl doesn't like to be lavished with nice things? If you were caught drinking with this girl, others would be sure to follow.
Sabrina Spellman (from Sabrina: The Teenage Witch)
We're pretty sure Sabrina wasn't all that "teenage" by the end of the shows run, but all the better. She would be a great time to be out with and could always use her magic if it's really needed.
Edie Britt (from Desperate Housewives)
Yes, technically Ms. Britt bought the farm, but when she was alive she was a great partier. And even though she didn't play nice with the other women, she was outgoing and independent—two very important traits in a wingwoman. Which Character On "Desperate Housewives" Is Living Your Love Life?
Buffy Summers (from Buffy the Vampire Slayer)
Hunting people, hunting vampires—it's all the same, right? At the very least, Buffy would have great stories as conversation starters.
So tell us. Who do you think would make a great wingwoman?