Can The Millionaire Matchmaker Help Me Find Love?

I finished my glass of Cava sparkling wine in silence, failing to garner attention from two suited guys on my left. Did I look too engrossed in my fake home design task? Maybe it was my failure to hold either's gaze for five full seconds while giving them a "radiant" smile (I'm not sure anyone but Heidi Klum can do this). I left before getting a rep among waitstaff as "that chick who sat alone, ordered the cheapest drink and scarfed all the truffle popcorn."

Then I met a boy. Patti claims there are approximately 185,000 more single women than men in the New York, northern-New Jersey area and suggests we single women move if at all possible. It's true: our odds stink. But whatever the disproportion, New York is a flirty city. I met Jay, a tall, handsome Indian at a networking event and we set up a Sunday afternoon rendezvous. First Date Dos and Don'ts

Patti proffers several pre-date "maximize your sexiness" warm-up techniques. Though I didn't have any removable tattoos available for my inner thigh, nor pearls to wear while beholding myself naked in the mirror, I managed to satisfy the "have a glass of champagne" tip with two mimosas at brunch.

Jay and I sat in a sunny alcove of a café and chatted easily about salsa dancing and travel. I avoided conversational no-no's like my ex, money, religion, politics, celebrities and "negative subjects that depress you" (unless texting counts). Though I did mention one off-limits subject: my children. Thing is, they're not born yet, but I let slip that I was worried for them. As we both lamented the simpler days of our youths, spent climbing trees before email, cell phones and the Wii, I exclaimed, "I'm afraid for my kids!"
 
Oops. Was that bad?

Jay hasn't called for a second date. Maybe it's time to work "licious" into my online dating screen name.

Would I recommend Patti's book to other singletons? Sure, provided they took it with a hunk of salt. While a majority of content is designed to attract men regardless of their tax brackets, she is after all, the millionaire matchmaker. Some suggestions, like cozying up to Mercedes dealers (and offering to send them referrals in exchange for matches) and disregarding a man in Starbucks with his computer because he may be "unemployed or poor" are downright gross. But if you can overlook spurts of extreme ridiculousness, it's an entertaining read with some decent tips.

Overall ratings, on a scale of 1 - 10:

Writing: 7
Actionable Advice: 8
Potential Humiliation Factor in Following Advice: 7
Focus on Inner Self: 3
Focus on Appearance: 8
Guru Sass: 9
Touchy Feely Self-Helpiness: 1