The "housewife" title's a misnomer, as only three—Ramona, Jill and Alex—are actually married. And Suzy Homemaker-style housewives they are not. But, Season Two of the show's been aflurry with relationship activity: the Countess divorcing, Bethenny on the prowl and every "wife" tripping over herself for the chance to share dating tips.
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Here, we've created a Real Housewives report card with grades based on their own relationships and/or the love advice they dole out to others (er, to Bethenny).
Pros: Alex and husband Simon are so close that they'd be first in line for hip attachment surgery, were it to arrive en vogue. They share common interests, including shopping, wearing skimpy swim suits and trolling the internet for sex (they met on a Casual Encounters-type site).
Cons: Their starry-eyed obsession often seems to take precedent over things that are debatably more important, like disciplining their children, finishing their home renovations and fostering individual friendships. Healthy Boundaries: Are You Too Close for Comfort?
Alex's grade: A-
Pros: Jill and second hubby, Bobby, run a business together together (Zarin Fabrics, in case you've missed the mention on every episode) and he's often at her side for Real Housewives social events. He seems like a mensch, though we often hear bupkis from him during Jill's heated debates.
Cons: Jill often seems to give more attention to her hateful little Chihuahua, her daughter Ally and Gay Husband Brad than she does to Bobby. Breakups' New Battleground: The Dog
Jill's grade: B
Pros: Ramona and husband Mario both manage successful careers and their marriage. They play tennis together and seem to have a flirty rapport.
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Cons: Sometimes their flirtations with other people make us wonder. Remember last season when Ramona had to drag Mario out of another woman's clutches at a party? They're also uber-intense about their tennis matches, social expectations (hence their squabbles with Jill, Alex and Simon) and their daughter Avery's life. We wonder if these two ever just chillax with each other. Does Work Stress Affect Your Relationship?
Ramona's grade: B