John Mayer is still crying over the end of his affair with Jennifer Aniston (and whether his undying love of Twitter contributed to the breakup), but instead of coping sensibly—we like to fill our beer helmets with shiraz and watch Hugh Jackman movies when we get dumped—Mayer is taking a page from Taylor Swift and hitting back at Aniston in song.
"Heartbreak Warfare," Mayer's latest salvo in the Hundred Years' Aniston War of Woe Is Me My Womb Is Empty, features the lyrics "If you want more love, Why don't you say so?" and "Drop his name, push it in and twist the knife again; Watch my face as I pretend to feel no pain, pain, pain," although it does not specifically mention Aniston, who has been conducting herself with discretion and dignity, qualities Mayer hasn't yet been able to fit into his 140-character limit.
Mayer's new soft-rocker-scorned track is just the latest in a long and awesome tradition of musicians taking out their heartbreak in song. Here, our top five angry breakup songs, and the celeb love affair flameouts that inspired them.
Alanis Morissette, "You Oughta Know." The Canadian rocker's sixteen-times platinum album, Jagged Little Pill, contained this searing indictment of an ex who's moved on, and perhaps the greatest revenge couplet ever written: "It was a slap in the face how quickly I was replaced/Are you thinking of me when you f*ck her?" The song is widely believed to be about Dave Coulier of Full House fame, which has always made us a little nauseated.
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