Per With Leather, Jessica Simpson is not getting enough quality time with Dallas Cowboys quarterback Tony Romo. In addition to playing 16 games of football (plus playoffs and the Pro Bowl when applicable) and necessary practices, workouts and film sessions, Tony Romo loves sporting in the great outdoors.

Like plenty of dudes in that mid-twenties to late seventies age bracket, Tony Romo likes to spend leisurely afternoons whacking tiny white balls and then chasing them around (please don't read too much into that last sentence, please). He and some buddies (as few as one and as many as three) grab a bag full of clubs, a few dozen balls, a twelve-pack of Bud (or Coors Light if they hate themselves) and spend a good three hours out on the golf course. Grab assin' around, requesting Mulligans, gimmes and generous drops, questioning each other's manhood, complaining about women, networking, you know, dude stuff.

But Jessica Simpson wants to spend more time with the Romo-sexual. To that end she's taking up golf, so they can be with each other all the time. As you can imagine, this probably is a bit of a shock to Tony Romo. Part of the beauty of a sport as unnatural and frustrating as golf is that it's a quick vacation from real life. Inviting your significant other eliminates a few of the finer points of the game, for instance if a guy hits a weak drive you're supposed to ask him if his husband is going to take the next shot for him. It would be demeaning and terribly un-PC to ask a woman that and it would be horribly emasculating for her to ask a dude that.

Urban legend states that "golf" was once an acronym for Gentlemen Only, Ladies Forbidden and maybe that's why some dudes dig it. If gals insist on making golf into a couples thing, guys are left with no recourse but to take up even more boring past times like fishing and putting ships into bottles. No one wants that, no one.

Your obligatory Caddyshack quote: "Oh, this is the worst-looking hat I ever saw. What, when you buy a hat like this I bet you get a free bowl of soup, huh? Oh, it looks good on you though."

Photos: Splash