The Genius Of The Double Date

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double date
The double date only seems like a really good idea.

There's no way of telling who invented the double date but if they could that gentleman would deserve a posthumous Nobel Prize (maybe the Peace Prize, I don't know). The concept: two people, theoretically friends or relatives, go out on a date with two other people, who are likewise acquainted, with the hope to ease the tension and awkwardness the first date/ job interview.

Many times, one or more of the daters is totally unfamiliar with the his/ her 'date.' The prospect of going out with some chick/ dude and knowing nothing about them save that someone (or computer algorithm) thinks you'd be a good match is daunting (the double blind date is particularly onerous). An on-call wingman adds a safety net for awkward silences, proof-positive that at least one person can stand you, a willing partner to bounce one-liners off and someone who can build you up or steer conversation to your areas of strength without looking particularly supercalifragilisticexpialaBRAGdocious.

 

But (and it's a big ole but, like Kim's), there is something inherently weird and needy about having a sidekick (or Siddhartha forbid that you're the sidekick) on something like a date. The double date totally makes sense… if you're a high school student (or Richie Cunningham and the Fonz). Romantic dates are about getting to know people, fair fight style*. They're not about having a crutch for the socially or emotionally retarded. They're not about calling dibs on the "good-looking one" (been on the short end of that stick and it hurts getting the loser of Rock-Paper-Scissors). And they're certainly not about discovering within 15 minutes that you're not into your date and spending the next 3 hours devising schemes on how to make the mythical double date switcheroo.

Double dates are best left to teens, Siamese twins and the professionals. These two dudes, Dave and Ethan, appear to have figured out a pretty good system. Enjoy:

*Fair fights and good dates are one-on-one, otherwise it's sort of a scam.