Divorce from Ryan Phillippe was "humiliating," Jake Gyllenhall is "fabulous."
As the rug was pulled from beneath Reese Witherspoon's marriage, she went through the normal blame cum depression cum bleak outlook on life process that everyone goes through during a divorce. And, obviously, she's a real person but her answers seemed quite genuine which sort of lends credence to the idea that "Reese Witherspoon is one of us." We're guessing that her underwears [sic] are expensive enough that we could trade them for rent, but she has this wholesome, friendly vibe about her.
Unlike other high-profile divorces, there was no Team Witherspoon and Team Phillippe, everyone seemed to have Reese Witherspoon's back. From what we can tell, Ryan Phillippe is an alright guy but there's something about his punim that makes him seem a fairly unfriendly. Reese's grill, on the other hand, makes it really easy to remember that she played the forthright and generous Elle Woods. Plus, it seems like he has a propensity to use the word "actually," and that just drives people up the wall.
So far, the only thing we can think of to fault Reese Witherspoon on is that she seems a little pushy (or possibly way older than her biological, cute-as-button age). Legend has it that there are hard, fast and draconian rules in the Witherspoon household. Rules which even eye candy Jake Gyllenhaal is obligated to follow (like no swearing and no feet on the coffee table, that obstenent beeotch!). Despite making Jake Gyllenhall live like somewhat less of a man (seriously, one of the perks about a grownup is being allowed to curse without fear of recrimination), she totally digs old boy. According to Digital Spy, Reese Witherspoon thinks Jake Gyllenhaal is "fabulous" and really the sweetest, bestest, nicest, handsomest, wonderfulest man to ever grace Jesus' green Earth (we added everything after "fabulous"). But she's reluctant to talk much about the relationship much publically. Nice, just like a regular, old regular person. America's sweetheart. And, evidently, she has a movie or something in theaters soon.