There's a certain appeal to the art of light-hearted self-improvement. The stakes are low — if you promise to buy yourself a cute vibrator and you never get around to it, so what? In that spirit, here is a list of sexual self-improvers for the new you.
1. If you've been faking it, cut that right out: Just quit it. If you're tired of the action, why not just say "We can stop now?" And if you feel the need to prop up a sagging ego (not your own), maybe it's time to wonder why you don't feel comfortable just telling the truth, or to start going out with someone who doesn't require that sort of bolstering.
2. Try something new: As simple as leaving the light on or as complicated as joining a special interest club and buying a whole new wardrobe.
3. Learn about something new: Even if you're not sure you want to try it. A great deal of our "Ew, gross, nobody should ever do that" reaction to unusual practices comes more from their novelty than from any real inherent heinousness. That, and from our tendency to assume the worst. So much of so-called kinky sex is not only utterly harmless but rather endearingly nerdly in practice, but there's no way to know this without risking at least a little exposure. Web-surfing is safe!
More From First Wives World:
- An Experts' Guide to Sex and Dating After Divorce
- Do's and Dont's of Post-Divorce Dating
- The Condom Conversation: Navigating Birth Control After Divorce
Sex after divorce can be intimidating: a new partner can mean a new bed, a new body, and new — well — techniques. Usually, though, the hardest part is just becoming psychologically ready to date again. After that, you're likely to find that the old riding a bike analogy applies to other leisure activities as well. That being said, there's a lot you can work on all by yourself to improve your sex life.