Do Women Really Want To Pee Standing Up?

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bathroom
A weird product called the Go-Girl allows women to pee standing up.

Ever wonder what it would take for men and women to be truly equal? If your answer was men have to be able to give birth and women have to be able to pee standing up, then we're half way there. It turns out that Arnold Schwarzenegger movie hasn't come true (but robots are out to get you), but College Candy reports of a magical device that allows women to tinkle while standing, rather than sitting, squatting or hovering.

Judging by the schematic, it's more or less a man's athletic cup attached to a funnel. Who knew that gender equality (really superiority, until men figure out a method for withholding sex) would come in the form of a Pink, plastic-y doohickey? But do we really need the Go-Girl? How much is it really going to speed up the process? Seconds?  Would the ladies' lavatory have to be filled with urinals? And in that case, what happens if a woman has to theoretically do other bathroom work? (I've never met a lady who has ever, ever had to do any other kind of work in the restroom, to my knowledge.) Won't everyone be on to her? And isn't going to the bathroom, as a lady, about a lot more than laying down a stream? What kind of girl-talk gems will be lost without all of waiting around? You may never find out what a yutz Brian is or that Johnny sort of digs you back.

 

Furthermore, what about leg muscle atrophy? Are sort of gross toilets keeping women's legs powerful and keeping us (the western world) competitive in track and field? What about women recklessly carrying around octuplets on weak thighs? And powerful (not necessarily muscular) legs keep a lot of options open in the bedroom dep't.

While it may seem like a good idea for women to pee standing up, there are a number of issues that we, as a people, need to work out before we can go forward with this. Your (if you're a gal) relationship with the bathroom is about a lot more than tinkle; and your thigh muscles may recover from the lack of squatting. And on top of all that, we're sure that a few guys may not get the memo and stumble in on a standing pee-er and freak out The Crying Game style. Honestly, if you're not out-of-doors and you're not dealing with an unsavory toilet scenario, is it really that big of a deal? Fine, it's got its moments. You, ugh, go girl.