Why We Need Adultery
Last night I interviewed Susan Squire, author of I Don't: A Contrarian History Of Marriage.
I had an awesome interview last night with Susan Squire, author of I Don't: A Contrarian History Of Marriage (she's written two other books that I haven't read but plan to, asap). We talked about her theory about why a tradition of adultery is helpful for marriage, what American culture gets wrong in its conception of marriage, and tons of other interesting stuff.
The cool thing about talking to her was that her ideas about marriage are backed up by history--what people have been doing for thousands of years. She's not basing her opinions on some random study or a psychological theory, she's basing them on the way people have acted, and there's actual, historical evidence to back up what she's saying.
If (when) I get this thing transcribed (it's two hours!), it'll be a super interesting read.
Discussion
When I'm in a cynical mood, I think prostitution is an institution created to support monogamy. The guys get to have sex, but they don't break up their friends' marriages. The johns are unlikely to fall in love with the prostitutes, so they go on supporting their own kids. None of the guys has to take responsibility for any kids that are created (at least not pre-DNA testing).
The system is terrible for the prostitutes and not so good for the wives, but it's great for guys who want monogamous marriage and extra sex - all on their own terms.
I'm assuming you're going to give us more info on this concept? I recall back in the 70's Ann Landers or Dear Abby made a suggestion once that everyone should have at least one affair in their marriage. I think she took a lot of flack over that one. Twenty years ago I would've said-not interested(even two years ago). But, I'm open-minded-very cautiously. I'm curious to read more. We'll be watching.
