The Real Reason For Brit's Split

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The Real Reason For Brit's Split
Divorce came because K-Fed hung out with the kids too much.

We really love it when Reuters chimes in on gossip items, it makes everything feel a little less salacious. Back when they started covering celeb stuff, someone must have been like, "OK. We see what kind of traffic all the other news outlets are getting with their celebrity coverage. Integrity be damned, we’re going to start a Britney Spears section*." And The Atlantic scoffed, until they realized that they needed a make-over and put Brit-Brit on the cover. We can only be a year away (tops) from putting Lindsay Lohan on the cover of The Economist.

Anywhom, Reuters Is quoting former backup dancer** Kevin Federline says that his marriage to Britney Spears disintegrated because of the time he was spending with his (and her) kids. Evidently, she wanted to rock and roll all night and part of the day (snacking and napping take up time too). And decided that his responsible (uncool) behavior was grounds for celebrity divorce.

And because of the carousing and less than motherly behavior, K-Fed knew that he had to get custody of these little tater tots to provide them, and this is the crazy part, the best possible environment for them to grow. Yeah, kids, Mama was a rolling stone. Per Reuters, K-Fed is "rooting" for Britney to make it and has left the door open for a future reconciliation. The zebra never changes its stripes, the jackal eats what the hunter kills and the lion sleeps tonight.

Our favorite part of celeb coverage from Reuters is their utter lack of regard for mundane details and pop culture. For instance, they say that Kevin Federline has "a young child with an ex-girlfriend," rather than specifically mentioning that she’s the adorable d-list star Char Jackson. They also totally misidentify the beginning the Britney Spears downward spiral as her 2006 split from K-Fed. Everyone knows that the center stopped holding when Justin Timberlake's video for "Cry Me A River" came out in out in 2002. She may have shaved her head, lost her kids and gone swimming in her knickers after the divorce but she did marry Kevin Federline after "Cry Me A River."

*Reuters once claimed that they were suspending coverage of Paris Hilton unless she did something actually newsworthy and we're pretty sure that they covered her the next time she 'forgot' her undies.

**Backup Dancer is a fine occupation and a good starting place for a career. Tupac, JLo and kooky Paula Abdul started careers dancing for Digital Underground, In Living Color and the Lakers, respectively.

Photos: Splash

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