Peace and love are overrated. This holiday season, stop being the nice girl.
It’s that time of year when you can't enter a department store, pop into a drug store, or grab a cocktail without hearing a plethora of Christmas songs (we're not complaining, we sing along to Mariah, too). There’s also a lot of talk about what list you’ll land on; we’re you naughty or nice this year? Though we consider ourselves to be good women, we can't help but to wonder what exactly people mean by being nice? Is it Is staying up past midnight baking cupcakes for neighbors, killing yourself to search for the perfect gift for every member of your boyfriend's family or smiling (bitter) sweetly as your distant relative makes a snide comment about your "still being single"? If so, we think it's time to redefine the word. Here are five valid reasons it's much nicer to be naughty.
You'll have better holiday sex.
"Nice" girls need a full-size bed and an empty house. Your man is begging for the chance to get a view of your holiday lingerie but the idea of giving him a private show in the room that houses your childhood bed while everyone else is downstairs spreading good cheer just feels wrong.
Naughty girls get a flush the old-fashioned way. Is there is anything hotter than forbidden, sweaty sex with the risk of getting caught? Maybe, but are you really going to sit around and wait for us to come up with a list? Adults have sex and as long as you're not flaunting it in anyone's face, it's perfectly fine to sneak out with your guy while your uncle is explaining his investments. Not only will it be a thrill but you'll both come back down merry and bright.
2. You'll draw a boundary then and there (avoiding any future internal drama).
"Nice" girls turn the other cheek. At his annual holiday party, your guy's flirty coworker has been working your last nerve with her blatant man-baiting lash-batting. When she leans over the punch bowl--oops-- her boobs spills out of her sparkly top and brush against his arm. You're annoyed, but the "nice" girl in you says, "Let it go, she's drunk."
Naughty girls know that diplomacy is nice, but there's a difference between being tactful and being a doormat. Flipping tables is beneath you, but letting her know she's out of line is not only acceptable, but a self-respect must. We've seen the line "Why don't you take care of refilling your drink, and I'll take care of flirting with my fiancé" work wonders.
3. You won't feel taken for granted.
"Nice" girls remind themselves that "It's the thought that counts." Your man gets you a paisley scarf that screams, "I just bought this off of the clearance rack yesterday!" Or worse, he gets you nothing at all after you've made it clear you wanted to celebrate the holiday. You know he hates shopping, though, so you smile and tell him you love it.
Naughty girls know that if there's no thought, it doesn't count. You don’t need a pair of Louboutins or a set of diamond studs, but if you’ve agreed to exchange gifts and he shows up with a hollow chocolate Santa with the Duane Reade sticker still on it, you have a right to be pissed. Being in a relationship means taking the time to celebrate your partner and your union at special times, and this can be done even when funds are low.
4. You won't be exhausted doing all of the errands.
"Nice" girls do it all alone. There are cards to send, gifts to buy and food to shop for. Your husband expects his name to be on everything, but the only effort he's putting in is enough to flip the channel after you told him that watching boxing on TV won't help you box up these gifts.
Naughty girls push for equal efforts. Write out a list of everything that needs to be done, split in half and let your guy choose which one he's going to take on. Reward your efforts with a bottle of wine and your favorite take out when the chores are done.
5. You'll get while you give.
"Nice" girls give to charity. Funds are low and you've got presents to buy for your trendy sister, deserving mom and best friend. Still want to help? There are a wide variety of products that will not only please your loved ones but also benefit breast cancer research. Think Pink!
Naughty Girls love to give, but aren't ashamed to get a kick-back. Use a points-earning credit card to sponsor organizations to build a point reserve to put towards a much-needed post-holiday vacation.
Brenda Della Casa is the Author of Cinderella Was a Liar, The Editor-in-chief and Digital Content Strategist at Preston Bailey Designs, A Huffington Post Blogger and the Founder of BDC Life In Style. Facebook: BrendaDellaCasa, Twitter: @BrendaDellaCasa, Instagram: @BrendaDellaCasa.