How To Avoid Anal Accidents

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anal accidents
For anal play, use an anal toy: it should be the right shape and should be yours.

Those men, always getting themselves into buttloads of trouble! They really should know better...

Yesterday Boinkology alerted us to this story about a priest who got a potato stuck in his tush—apparently he fell backwards and up his ass it went. Riiight. Quoth the surgeon who extracted the sad root vegetable:

He explained to me, quite sincerely, he had been hanging curtains naked in the kitchen when he fell backwards on to the kitchen table and on to a potato. But it's not for me to question his story. He had to undergo surgery to have it removed.

Then there's this letter on the Daily Bedpost from a dude who used his wife's dildo as a butt plug without telling her. Oops. Em & Lo give him a severe chastising, and suggest that he buy his own butt toy, one with a flared base to avoid any vicar-ous incidents:

A person's sex toy is sacred, and only they should decide how, where, when and upon whom it is used. If the toy is porous, fecal bacteria can get lodged in the microscopic nooks and crannies, potentially leading to a nasty infection for her, no matter how long you scrubbed it with anti-bacterial soap. 

Women are much smarter about these things: they do their research before sticking foreign objects in their anuses! "Anal Sex for Beginners," and "A Girl's Guide to Anal Sex" are two of YourTango's most popular stories.

Here are three tips to get you started on solo anal play:

 

1. Make sure you're relaxed, or nothing's going to fit up there.

2. Use lots of lube. Your rear doesn't self-lubricate like your front.

3. Always use a toy with a flared base—you don't want any trips to the emergency room, no matter how discreet the doctors are.

And as always, use your own sex toy, and have fun!

 

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