Couples Therapy For K-Fed & Brit-Brit?

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Couples Therapy For K-Fed & Brit-Brit?
Are Britney Spears & Kevin Federline trying to reconcile?

What the sh*t, brah? According to ShowBizSpy, Britney Spears and her ex-husband Kevin Federline are going to couples therapy in an attempt to work things out. And they got this from the National Enquirer. And now, because the Enquirer beat up that Johnny Edwards story, we have to take all of their stories with a grain of pepper (or whatever the opposite is of a grain of salt). This really sucks, because we want to believe that K-Fed and Brit-Brit are making another run at it, we really do. But dealing with the Enquirer is such a risky proposition. They paid an air hostess (flight attendant, whatever) to take nakee photos with Kathie Lee's husband. They are nefarious, but we want this Britney thing to happen.

And it's not just that kids, Small Fry and Tater Tot, stand a better chance of growing up "normal" when the have 2 parents (even silly bastards like Britney and Kevin). But having these 2 on the loose is not good for anyone. She's still Britney Spears, she could seduce and destroy almost any non-famous person between the ages of 22 and 32, man or woman. They remember "...Baby One More Time," they (we) can suspend our disbelief about the last 5 years, we're ready to believe again. And as for K-Fed, dude must be mad charming, it can't all be about the dancing. And he is potent. It seems like no one is on birth control these days and he will make you pay for that. For real.

So, what's it gonna be? Is the Enquirer, in bit of Murdoch-ian genius, playing on our greatest hopes and worst fears? Or is there some truth to this insanity? Someone get to the bottom of this, we're going to put on a velour tracky, eat a plate of fish sticks, and maybe shoot beer cans from our front porch.

While we're all suspending our disbelief or whatever it is you people do, we read in Parade that William Robert Thornton (that's Billy Bob Thornton to you and me, kids) is still amigos with Angelina Jolie. And that she’s one of his "best friends in the world." Uh, generally when someone gets a tattoo of your name removed it means that the "best friends" business is probably not reciprocated. In fact, with the exception of The New Adventures Of Old Christine, we've never really heard of anyone pulling off the ex to best bud coup. "OMG, I thought it was a figure of speech when you said that you wanted so stay friends. Cool, I'm in. Can we still have sex? Oh, forget it then."

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  • In Anglo Saxon times, a man could divorce his wife on the grounds that she was too passionate.