What Arranged Marriage Can Teach Us

By YourTango

arranged marriage
Arranged marriage offers three keys insights into finding true love.

2. And Then Go Find It.
Too many of us still expect that our dating and love lives will follow the plot of a Hollywood script – that one day Mr. Right will just walk into our lives (with no effort on our part) and sweep us away to our personal happily ever after.

Could it happen? Maybe.


Will it? Probably not.

In contrast, arranged marriages are all about proactively finding the right partner. Once a family knows what they are looking for in a potential partner, they spread the word through family, friends, colleagues, newspaper ads, online sites, and professional matchmakers.

Now I don't suggest that you necessarily need to do all of those– but don't be afraid to take charge of your dating and love life and stop waiting for romance to come to you.

3. Put Coupledom In Context.
Since couples in arranged marriages come together as a result of their extended family and community, they naturally think of their relationship as part of something bigger than just the two of them.

In contrast, we culturally tend to focus on the idea that a happy or strong relationship should be about "just the two of us."

It might sound good at first – but once the initial infatuations wears off, this kind of thinking actually put a great deal of stress on the couple. Especially in the long term. Instead, try and make your relationship part of something bigger, such as a shared project or charitable cause.

Researching arranged marriages made me realize how difficult our culture has made it to find relationship happiness, but with a slight shift in our thinking, it doesn't have to be quite so hard. Good luck!

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