It's one of the great sex myths: Women want foreplay; men just want play. But according to an ABC News poll, 80% of both men and women say they have "the right amount" of foreplay in their sex lives. Not only that, a study conducted at the University of New Brunswick indicates that men want more foreplay than they're having.
"Men do not hold exclusive franchise rights on goal-oriented sex," writes Susan Crain Bakos in her book What Men Really Want: Straight Talk from Men about Sex . "Foreplay has come to mean the sexual work men do for women to prepare us for intercourse. The assumption is that he doesn't need any preparation. One man described foreplay as 'the period in which she holds him off while he revs her up."
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But if that's true, why does Cosmo field questions about how to get a man to slow down on the race to intercourse, while Men's Health readers are asking 'How can I make my wife more interested in quickies?'
So when a guy dives under the covers for some oral action, his foreplay clock is ticking up, while his girlfriend's hasn't even started.
"My boyfriend and I used to have hot sex," said Amy,* 27, "There was tousling and playing and teasing. We still have great chemistry, but now when he's in the mood, he seems to think he can just roll over and stick it in. His idea of foreplay is sticking his hand on my crotch."
Sound selfish? While a woman might interpret this as an indication that her guy doesn't care about her pleasure, he may think he's following the golden rule: Do unto others as you'd have done unto you..
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