Why So Many NYC Housewives

Portfolio magazine (think Vanity Fair meets Forbes) ran an article last week about the overabundance of housewives in New York City. It must have seemed like a bit of a lark when Bravo launched a spin-off of The Real Housewives Of Orange County in NYC. It's New York, everyone's on the grind for every dime, cousin. Right? According to the 2000 census, only 49% of married, white women with a high school education (HSEMWW) had gainful employment. And women with and without children have almost identical figures (percentages of employment, women without children haven't been bent out of shape and so usually have better bodies).

What are all these housewives doing with their free time? Another survey suggests that 1/3 of the mothers portion are having an affair. Where do they find the time? At any rate, the Portfolio article has found a correlation between traffic congestion in a city and unemployment among the HSEMWWs of that city. Yes, bros, what you heard was right, everything changes when they become a wife (hi-oooo). This probably means that she'll want to 'talk' when he gets home from the office. And hopefully for these poor, working bastards 'talk' is a euphemism for very brief foreplay.