Secret Weapon #1: How not to be bitter at your friends’ weddings.
Yes, somehow even the ugliest sister from your sorority has managed to land herself a man and get married while you can’t even scare up a date for her wedding. This unjust, but true scenario has all the makings of the Panic Years – unless you do something about it. So what if a less-desirable friend ties the knot before you? This is no reason for your bitterness to boil over, is it? Is it?!! Remember, you’re going to have to learn to accept—not fight—the reality of your “friends” getting married. And eventually, you will not just fake—but feel—true joy at your friends’ weddings, despite any humiliation you must suffer through while wearing peach organza.
Secret Weapon #2: How to exercise wedding day restraint.
Of course bridal backlash has crossed the mind of any SPS with even the mildest case of The Panic Years. One of the high points in the life of a SAP (settled and pious) friend is to point out the obvious at weddings: that someone else is getting married and you’re not. These haughtily-nuptialed friends seem to take pleasure in your Panic pain. But now is not the time to lose what’s left of your composure and decimate any chance of hooking up with a single groomsman! Let their insensitive and pointed comments roll off your back as you seductively strut your stuff on the dance floor and your married friends are left to argue over their intake of refined sugar over the Viennese table.