Now that the Oscars are out of the way, there's been some serious water cooler talk about all the glamorous—and not-so-glamorous—couples that graced the red carpet. (In fact, the combined faux pas of Daniel Day-Lewis' brown shoes and Rebecca Miller's bad dress will likely crowd the Middle East peace process out of the headlines for weeks.)

But forget fashion. If celebs insist on dating one another, can they at least get compatibility right? Ignoring the rules of who's actually available, already happily hitched, gay, straight or somewhere in between, we at Tango took it upon ourselves to play matchmaker. Here, a few famous couples we'd like to see together…even if they only lasted a week.

Kanye West and Madonna: Because when you love yourself more than humanly possible, you require a partner who does, too.

Justin Timberlake and Ryan Phillippe: Because they're both too pretty to be straight, and we often have a hard time telling them apart.

Jennifer Aniston and David Schwimmer: Because there's only so far dating your dog (or dating with your dog) can get you. And because we want Rachel and Ross forever.

Carla Bruni and George Clooney: Because we'd love to see which beautiful commitment–phobe would spook first. And for the opportunity to christen them Brun-Cloon, of course.

Pamela Anderson and Jennifer Lopez: Because with Pam's rack and J.Lo's world-renowned behind, this T&A combo could take over the world.

Martha Stewart and Ron Popeil: Because these two media moguls could truly create the perfect home.

Angelina Jolie and Marilyn Manson: Because she's pretty-creepy, he's fugly, and
it just kinda works in a goth-y way.

Michael Jackson and Maria Shriver: Because they could get package deals on all that plastic surgery.