Study Shows Males Become Amorous On Alcohol

Some researchers with a lot of time on their hands decided to see if alcohol makes males more amorous. And evidently they couldn’t find any human subjects or primates, so they settled for the next best thing. Fruit flies. And their findings were very interesting. The researchers, led by Dr Kyung-An Han of Penn State University, discovered that fruit flies get fairly horny when exposed to alcohol. And, evidently, they get beer goggles, because these presumably heterosexual fruit flies also courted male fruit flies. We imagine that the next step is to repeat the experiment on a slightly higher class of organism.

We know that everyone is a little squeamish about experimenting on animals and human beings, but this was a perfect storm. Penn State is a big football school. And these days big football is synonymous with big drinking. They could easily got some undergrads (provided they were 21 of course) drunk off blackberry brandy and observed them in their natural setting. The Lion’s Den, Happy Valley’s best bar. It would be an education alright. And as far as courting other males goes; you should see the man on man love after a big football win. “Oh my God, keep hugging me, broseph. I want to remember this moment the rest of my life.”

Read more of the story from the Herald Sun