I interrupt this message of fighting and arguing to bring you a day in the sun (FYI: I’ve been writing a series of blogs on Fighting Fair – see below). I was going to blog again this week about another Fighting Strategy. But I am pooped. As I was this past week-end from all that is going on at break neck speed in my life.
To back up just a bit: If you are a veteran of my blog, you know that Steve and I work opposite schedules. His work as a musician is mostly in the evening while I have a regular 8-4 deal going. Lately, it’s been even more hectic as I decided to work my way back on to the stage: not only in a band I’m singing with but also acting in a 2-person play. (What the hell was I thinking???!!!!) So between work, our rehearsals and practice, we pretty much see each other in bed for a kiss good night. Sorry to admit this folks, but both of us are cherishing sleep more than sex these days. (I bet most of you can understand this.)
Another thing: Steve works most week-ends, but sometimes he does have a Saturday afternoon free. And what do we do on those precious days we get to spend together? Work on house-hold PROJECTS!
I hear from this friend, “We had a great time at the cabin last week-end.” Or from that sister, “A bunch of us got together for a day of tennis and bar-b-que.” What? How about us??? “Steve! It’s summer! Why aren’t we out there enjoying it? Why can’t we be just a little bit normal and join the fun on the week-ends?” He totally agreed. We do like to have fun we told each other. Really.
So: Last Thursday, my great friend Pam called to see if Steve and I would like to spend Saturday with her and her husband, Mark. The original plan was to kayak. YES! We have been waiting for an invitation, and (miracle) Steve was free. Well, the kayaks were all rented (that’s Minnesota for you). We ended up going to my parent’s house for the day. They live on a lake and have a boat and are always generous: they allow us to use their house as a day-off destination (We are lucky).
So, we spent the day on the lake, relaxing, drinking summer drinks, reading trashy magazines, and cruising around the lake. We had a damn good time smiling, laughing, and sunbathing. Steve and I really know how to relax together (as do Pam and Mark) – we’re really good at that. We need to do it more often. It recharges the batteries. And, thank goodness, the libido.
As do most couples, I think. We are so busy with our working lives, and kids and all of the extraneous things that go along with them. Once this play I’m in is over, Steve and I are going to take more days just to have fun in the sun. Really we will. The deck railing, the garage cleaning, the gardening, the landscaping, the basement organizing…..can just wait, damn it!
Make it a priority: Set aside days just to play with your partner (yes, take that any way you please)…
This concludes another view from my married life.