San Francisco by Kristine Kern

Romance isn't about rules. In San Francisco, birthplace of the Summer of Love and same-sex commitment, lovers of all stripes and types can pursue their amorous inclinations. A city this tolerant will be what you want it to be. The peninsular enclave has many faces: the serene slopes of Pacific Heights, Nob Hill with its jangling cable cars, the expansive green of the Marina's Crissy Field, the Mission's bustling street markets and nightlife, the Castro's rainbow window-dressing.

There's no need to feel schizophrenic, either, if you fancy a bit of each. San Francisco specializes in flights of fantasy, thanks to the varied--and equally passionate--ways it celebrates human bonding. But much about this city, not least its European sensibility and the pulse-quickening views around every corner, will inspire traditional romantics. Spend a day wandering through the cafés, bars, mom-and-pop pastry shops, and focaccerias of North Beach, the city's longtime Italian quarter. Its quaint alleyways and stairways leading nowhere in particular will put you in the mood for amore. You're with each other; who cares where you're headed? Go high, go low--in culture as well as altitude. The stomping ground of the famous Beats still has an avant-garde, isn't-art-the-living-end air, nowhere more pronounced than at City Lights Bookstore (co-founded by Beat poet/painter Lawrence Ferlinghetti). A visit there should be followed by a latte at Caffe Trieste or, if a quick nip is more your stimulant, check out Vesuvio, the onetime watering hole of Jack Kerouac. After you've got your literary cred, you can explore the less intellectual side of the 'hood by popping in to the Lusty Lady, a worker-owned cooperative of exotic dancers. In San Francisco, even the strip joints can make you feel good about yourself.

San Franciscans love their food, showcasing it with an almost French sensuality. If you start the day at the newly restored Ferry building along the Embarcadero, where the Farmers' Market (Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday, and Sunday) brings together fresh and organic growers from all over the Bay Area, you can fill a picnic basket with your own food orgy. (On days the market doesn't operate, troll the stores inside, like Cowgirl Creamery, an artisan cheese shop; the Golden Gate Meat Company; and Far West Fungi.)

Do we have to mention the Golden Gate Bridge? Yes, we do, and you locals could pay a bit more attention to this icon of romance, too. Grab a cup of Peet's coffee and walk the span for a sensation that the iciest San Francisco fog can't ruin. Glimpses of the Marin headlands on one side, the hilly latticework of San Francisco on the other, and the blue-gray expanse of bay and ocean in between can't help but make you love the one you're with. It takes only a bit more daring and athleticism to bike across, or you can save your energy for the Marin side and a hike on Mount Tamalpais, where the sounds of the city give way to the silence of the redwoods. On a hot day, on windswept Stinson Beach, float in the Pacific, gazing up at the mountains.

If natural beauty isn't enough of an aphrodisiac--well, you'll always have chocolate. The Joseph Schmidt Confections shop on 16th Street at Sanchez is packed with exotic treats, including egg-shaped truffles in flavors from champagne to Earl Grey tea. Whatever turns you on: that's San Francisco's way of love.

MEET someone whose Fifi is simpatico with your Fido on the beach at Crissy Field. If you're dogless, try the famous produce aisle at the Marina Safeway. Worst (or best) case scenario, you'll go home with something fresh for dinner.

FIGHT at Land's End. When you really need to get your feelings out in the open, this winding trail along the rugged northwest coast of the city provides plenty of room to clear the air.

HIDE & SULK amid a crowd captivated by the flirting "ladies" who serve up cocktails and hourly lip-synch shows at AsiaSF, a restaurant and nightclub South of Market where the gender-illusionist waitstaff offers good, clean fun, San Fran-cisco-style. Ocean Beach, which runs along the Great Highway, is perfect for a solitary stroll. Bring a sweater, and stay out of the water--the riptides are nasty.

MAKE UP by taking your beloved and your spat out to a Giants game. For the price of a ticket, you''ll get palm trees, water and bridge views, and nine whole innings to nurse your relationship off the DL. (Resist the ballpark's famous garlic fries.) If it was a really, really big fight, check into the Mandarin Oriental hotel, known for its sweeping view of city and bay. Where else could you watch the weather change or the city lights come on while sipping champagne in the bathtub?

HAVE DARING SEX in a dark corner at the EndUp. Close out the party with San Francisco's most frenetic after-hours crowd at the club's "T Dance," Sundays from 6 a.m. to 8 p.m. Booming house music and the lustful antics of anything-goes patrons should provide ample cover for amorous pursuits. Or drive your baby up to Twin Peaks. Put the car in park, and let your libido take the wheel.

BRING UP TABOO TOPICS at Good Vibrations' Antique Vibrator Museum, which is filled with clever machinery dating back to the 1800s and guaranteed to spur discussions of all things erotic. If viewing these devices designed to remedy "female disorders" should prompt more than purely academic interest, slip into the shop and buy a modern equivalent.

WHO ELSE: Mayor Gavin Newsom and Kimberly Guilfoyle Newsom; Sharon Stone and Phil Bronstein; honorary S.F. couples: Rosie O'Donnell and Kelli Carpenter, and everyone who got married on the steps of City Hall in 2004.