7 Lessons I Learned From Chick Flicks
Dangerous delusions about love—and the romantic comedies that feed them.
See also: Before Sunrise, Before Sunset, A Walk in the Clouds.
The Real Ending: Over dinner, you realize he has bad breath, a wife, and absolutely nothing whatsoever in common with you.
The As Good As It Gets Trap: You've found a guy who has that certain something--as well as a bad attitude, a fear of commitment, or just a nonspecific nasty streak.
Other than that, though, what a catch. Minor personality flaws won't stand in the way of your fate. You decide that your love can change him, because that's what true love does.
See also: Jerry Maguire, Reality Bites.
The Real Ending: You go to great lengths to show him that you're worth loving before ultimately deciding that he's never going to change--and that he's the last thing you'd want to complete you, anyway.
The An Affair to Remember Trap: You meet the perfect man and make elaborate, romantic plans for the future right away. He takes your number (no need for you to take his) and promises to call the next day.
When the phone doesn't ring, you don't worry--he's your soul mate after all, there's just been some misunderstanding. Two days later, you start to grow concerned that something has happened to him. Is he under a bus somewhere? Has he been taken hostage?
You go from concerned to all-out panicked. Despite the gentle protestations of your friends that perhaps he's just not that into you, you remain convinced that he was hit by a cab and rendered a cripple, and is too proud to leave his apartment.
See also: The Notebook.
The Real Ending: Three months later you see him dancing in a club with some chick in a tube top.
The When Harry Met Sally Trap: You've never been attracted to your male best friend, but recently things in the romance department have been less than enthralling. So you start to wonder; maybe, just maybe, The One has been staring you in the face all along.
Who cares if he still lives in his mom's basement? This is destiny, damn it.
The Real Ending: Prepare for an awkward, tequila-induced make-out session that definitely requires an "I don't know what I was thinking" email the next day.
The Titanic Trap: You just made partner and need to focus on work, but you can't get this new guy off your mind. His name is Bo, he never went to college, and he works at the burrito place where you sometimes grab lunch between clients.
Your friends ask what exactly you hope to gain from this relationship, but luckily you're not a snob like them, and you know that a person's job isn't what defines him.
See also: Sabrina, Pretty Woman, Sweet Home Alabama.
The Real Ending: At a company dinner, your boss asks Bo what he does and he replies, "I work the grill, but I'm hoping to be put on the register soon." Face it: If Leo had made it to dry land, that relationship would never have survived.
The Stepmom Trap: None of your romantic fantasies ended with Prince Charming leaving you for his secretary. Nor did they include falling for an otherwise great man with two sizable and unavoidable flaws (i.e., his children).
Discussion
Dude ... try watching musicals, instead. Men should, too. They're very instructive. They teach us men that we need to be gentlemen and teach us all that where romance is concerned, it never hurt anyone one bit to just let their heart SING!
Really great!!! Even though "Sleepless in Seattle" is my favourite movie and I really love every single movie named, it's true they don't help women in our search for our soulmate, but let us dream a little and keep seeing this nice movies, but knowing what you see is almost never real...
The author seems REALLY bitter, is she speaking from experience?
Although some of the advice is valid, I don't really think blaming hollywood for showing romance in idealistic terms is the answer. Folks. THEY ARE MOVIES!!
I also have to wonder if the author watched all of the movies that were categorized under the different misconceptions: comparing Sabrina and Sweet Home Alabama, to Pretty Woman and the Titanic? In Sweet Home Alabama the man had proved his worth, and was in-fact a successful businessman. In Sabrina she was an educated and articulate woman, making sharp class distinctions in romance simply doesn't fly anymore.
Admittedly Pretty Woman was quite a leap, but considering Titanic was roughly based on a true story, is it really that bad if we hold out for the impossible?
If all else fails it will help prevent the world from becoming overpopulated with underacheivers.
Fun to read. These movies definitely reinforce our lifelong "Cinderella" stories and other things that we are taught about love.
Funny, to the point and EXTREMELY true. This is a must read for all women who need a reality check.
You're just figuring this out NOW? and you're a published writer on relationships? Good lord. Myself and quite a few other men I know figured this out a long time ago. As Marlon Brando said in "Last Tango in Paris", the "fairytales are complete bullshit". Good and funny take on the movies though.
