Is Your Dog A Matchmaker Or A Deal Breaker?
Get a dog, meet a man. But what if your man doesn’t like your pooch?
Eventually, Puccini learned to live with such male impositions. Truth be told, he loves men. OK, he loves everyone, but he's shown a real affection for some of my dates. It's not always been reciprocated, though. One Friday night, a guy I'd been seeing came over. He walked into the apartment with a rather long face, went into my bedroom, slumped on the floor against the bed, and said, "I've got to tell you something." The possibilities whizzed through my head: He's dying of cancer; he doesn't want to see me anymore; he's got herpes. He finally let it out: "I really don't think I like your dog."
It's funny, sure. But it's also problematic. I've learned since then to "position" the dog—set expectations low. I immediately tell a new guy that he'll hate my dog. I cop to the fact that Puccini is hyper and spoiled. The guys always laugh. And then, when they meet him, he's not that bad. Some of them even end up liking him. (He is adorable, after all!)
Introducing your new man to your (old) dog tells you a lot about the man. The other day over lunch I asked a friend if she slept with her dog. "Of course," she replied. But what about her new husband? How did he take to sharing the bed? "I don't think I'd ever date a guy who didn't like my dog," she said firmly.
Still, as someone who has "kept her options open" and remained single longer than most, I chafed a bit at the realization that Puccini was a new non-negotiable in my life. Then I started thinking about the upside, which is substantial. My dog has taught me more about who I am, and that actually makes it easier to navigate the sea of potential dates. You can't get what you want until you know what you want. In my case, that's now a guy who'll share the love—with Puccini.
Discussion
Why date a crazy bitch who loves animals more than humans. This is definitely a red flag and you should dump that bitch: http://www.scribd.com/doc/21733512/Principles-101
I personally love dogs, but do not want a dog sleeping in my bed. I have lost a grilfriend or two because of this. A dog goes outside and brings in dirt, ticks, fleas, all kinds of pests, plus, all dogs smell. NO WAY are they getting in my bed!! and I question a girl's cleanliness if she allows this.
A big shout out to Kristin! My dog sleeps with me, as did his predecessor. However, I can understand that a canine bedmate is not always welcome. So I got my dog a bed, which he actually likes and curls up in quite often, even when my boyfriend is not over.
And an FYI, my dog is a pit bull mix, and he is renowned in my neighborhood for his friendliness.
I found this article of interest, but I am a guy who is not into sleeping with pets. I have lived with a few cats, I have a good relationship with my Sister's dog, you feed them a big chunk of ham, a dog will love you forever. But, I was not raised with critters in bed, I like clean sheets and I find dogs tend to stink a bit too often. I would rather use the time caring for another being in caring for kids. Dogs need as much care as kids to be properly trained, cleaned, and fed. And they never really grow up. My Sister does care for her dog and her kids, and does a really good job with both. You can tell the dog to do something and she understands and makes an effort to do the right thing. The kids are good teenagers, but... I do understand that in my search for a life partner I do have a bias against sleeping with pets.
I have found this article on dogs & dating to be right on the bullseye! I know, without a doubt, that I need a man who, at the very least, likes dogs. And, yes...just like the author, I sleep with mine and know my 2 dogs as my friends. Just like I don't give up a girlfriend when I am dating a man, I don't give up my dogs for one either. I'll respect my man's feelings, however, I expect him to do the same for me and try to at least be friends with my two dogs. I have found over time, that how a man responds to people in 'helping' jobs (waitressing, sales clerks, etc.), how he reacts to money subjects, how he reacts when he's hungry, how he responds about his relatives/mother, how he reacts to youngsters & oldsters....and how he reacts to animals, usually tells me about the very core & character of a man. If any of these 6 subjects are out of balance, the man is out of balance.
It then becomes a "woman beware" situation. Thanks for a good article.
Dee Scott Houston, Tx.
