The Etiquette of Oral Sex

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The Etiquette of Oral Sex
The ups, downs and in-betweens of oral sex.

And speaking of winners, Trudy's friends nearly choked on their chardonnay when the 25-year-old human resources manager described her husband's, uh, spirited oral sex demands.

"He goes down on me pretty much every night," says Trudy, who's clearly blessed with the luck of all the shamrock—picking drunks in Ireland. "In fact it isn't unusual for me to get a little tired of it and try to pull him up. Sometimes he relents, but other times he's more persistent and insists on making me orgasm."

The poor woman confesses that oral activity always leads to good ol' fashioned sex. But does it also mean she must go down on him every night? Not by a long shot.

Their arrangement works because both people end up satisfied.Regardless of the politics in your bedroom, the point is to give oral sex, and yourself, and your partner, a chance.

"Don't let fear determine what you do—let pleasure," suggests Dr. Sharna L. Striar, a certified sex therapist in New York City. "It's fun, it adds variety, it heightens pleasure. But it's a very intimate act, and because one person is so exposed, it's also very private. So you need to communicate your wants and needs."

But please, do so before going down on your partner. It's not polite to talk with... well, you get the idea.

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